She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
