My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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