you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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