I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
