I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
whose ass print is on the piano?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize