I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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