Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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