the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
