My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
