I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Come on in and take your pants off
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