I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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