um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
