there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
