So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize