You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
