Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
