Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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