good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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