Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
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