i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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