My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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