I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Randomize
