Will you blow on my dice?
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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