My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
