Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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