i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
