I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
