You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
