Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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