Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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