So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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