I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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