Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
