i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
