It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize