The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
