It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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