he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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