I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
