How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
