It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
