I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
