And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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