he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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