omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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