And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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