brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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