i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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