that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize