Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Randomize
